Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life

Love and relationships are not one-size-fits-all.

Good thing we have options! Most people assume that healthy or serious relationships which involve romance and sex are supposed to follow this path: from attraction and dating, through exclusivity and living together, to marriage that ideally lasts a lifetime.

 

However, there are plenty of other great ways to do relationships. Options that don't involve lying, cheating, affairs, infidelity, avoiding dating or relationships, swearing off sex or love, or not being true to yourself or others. The "Relationship Escalator" is the traditional bundle of social norms for intimate relationships: monogamy, cohabitation and much more, ideally until death do you part. Beyond this, it might not be obvious what other options exist.

 

WHO SHOULD READ THIS BOOK: This book is a fun, intriguing introduction to unusual relationship options. If you want to explore unconventional relationships, or simply to understand your options, you'll find guidance here. If you want to help people you know understand relationships that don't follow the norm, this is a friendly starting point.

 

WHAT MAKES THIS BOOK WORTH READING: This isn't just one person's opinion. Journalist Amy Gahran surveyed 1500 people about their unconventional intimate relationships: and how those relationships work and feel. They shared moving in-depth personal stories and insights.

More than 300 people are quoted in this nonfiction book.

"Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator" showcases real-life experiences of:
- Consensual nonmonogamy: Polyamory, swinging, open relationships, or being monogamish.
- Going solo: Choosing to live alone (or at least not with intimate partners), not surrendering individuality to couplehood, or remaining single by choice.
- Avoiding hierarchy: Not prioritizing a particular adult relationship by default, simply because it includes sex/romance or started first.
- Asexual and aromantic love, emphasize forms of intimacy and bonding that our society often discounts.
- Relationship anarchy: Where all aspects of a relationship are based on negotiation and consent.
- Valuing relationships that often get discounted: Ones that don't feel very intense, continue without interruption or last forever.

 

Traditional relationships are a fine choice for many people. And: relationships are always a choice. Isn't it better to make important choices consciously, with awareness of options -- rather than by default? 

Author: Amy Gahran
Publisher: Off the Escalator Enterprises LLC
Published: 02/03/2017
Pages: 316
Binding Type: Paperback
Weight: 1.21lbs
Size: 10.00h x 7.00w x 0.66d
ISBN: 9780998647012

About the Author
Journalist Amy Gahran lives in Boulder, Colorado. Her day job is covering geeky topics. Her passion is, well, passion: talking to people (and writing) about the kind of love, tenderness, connection, and support that make life worthwhile. A big believer in resilience, Amy always keeps her options open. For a few years, she published the blog SoloPolynet under the pen name Aggie Sez - which has since stuck as a nickname. So she answers to both names, and to her feline overlords.

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